Category: Sex -  L.A. Tripp
 
Are you one of those readers that will gloss over killing and dead bodies in a book but will cringe or even yell at the author if there is so much as a hint of a curse word?

Are you one of those readers that will allow all types of sex and bondage and alternative lifestyles but will blast an author for one typo?

Are you one of those readers that is so holy that the hint of even a kiss will send your lust drive over the cliff?

Or are you a reader that has the philosophy "anything goes"?

What kind of reader are you?

Do you gloss over the occasional blip in the editing process? Or do you leave a scathing review because "in" should have been "on" on page 223.

Do you get lost in the story or does the story get lost on you?

I don't know. I'm confused. I don't see how a person can raise their ire about "fuck" being in a story yet not bat an eyelash about a dead body being on page 1. With blood and guts spilled. And even some semen left behind from the brutal rape. By a vampire. That sparkles. And then that vampire is the good guy and the woman that is no longer around is the villain. No offense toward Twighlight fans. I'm one of you.

Just sayin....
 
Here are a couple more dynamics to keep in mind.

We all deal with cultural issues. Americans live differently from Asians (for example), so they make different lifestyle choices. We also show respect a bit differently. However, when you peel away all the surface layer elements just mentioned, an Asian woman and an American woman will both notice what they consider to be a hot guy when he walks by. The core attraction applies no matter the culture.

This also holds true for the differences between black, white, brown, Asian-American, Native American, European, Swedish, French, Canadian, Mexican, Jamaican, and any other culture you can think of.

Brad Pitt, Vin Diesel, J. Lo, and Angelina Jolie are all considered hot across the globe. Yet, they could all represent different cultures. However, they’ve cut through the surface layers and stir the attraction in your gut, or a lower part of the anatomy. People in every culture recognize confidence and sexiness. Those things are universal. Erogenous zones are the same world wide because the human body is the same. And, bottom line, the same body parts are used for sex and reproduction in every culture, bar none.

You have windows of opportunity to talk to attractive women. If you don’t take these windows when they are presented, you either completely miss your opportunity to start getting to know someone who could be a great person, or you must be skilled enough to create another window of opportunity.

When you are meeting and interacting with women during the day in various public places, understand that these women normally have a to-do list in their head, so they may be in a hurry. They also (usually) have not put hours into making themselves up to go out during the day. They aren’t looking to meet anyone.

As you meet these women, the pace of the interaction is different, and the comfort level between you is different from meeting them in a club or bar. Those same women will be more difficult to meet at night.

Most guys can be ready to walk out the door in minutes. With guys who really primp themselves, it takes a half hour, tops.

When women primp themselves to go out at night, they put a hell of a lot of effort into their appearance. You’re looking at one to two hours of prep time. They want the men they meet to have the same pride in their own appearance. These women also want to stand out from all of the other females they expect to be out on that given night. They fuss about their hairstyle, makeup, each article of clothing (tops, pants, shoes, tights/hose, etc.), earrings, finger rings, eyelashes, and more, all in an effort to catch your attention. So, guys, reward them for that.

What actually tends to happen is, as one special person said to me, “My girlfriends and I used to go out to look to meet someone, but eventually, you start thinking, what’s the point? You don’t meet any men of quality, any men who have standards. Even the sex isn’t satisfying, if you go that far.” Guys, time to change that dynamic.

Let me also state this:

Reading beyond this page will offend many, including those who consider themselves righteous and holy, those who consider themselves very conservative, those who refuse to think any negative thoughts, and those that can’t stand someone being blunt with them.

If you fit into one of the above categories, I still encourage you to read further. Why? Because, as uncomfortable as it might make you, you’ll still learn from what’s in this book.

I’ll be honest with you in this book. I’ll pull no punches. I’ll be straightforward and put the truth in your face. If you can stomach all that, I promise you’ll shut the back cover, after every word has been read, more enriched than you are right now.

 
Let's talk briefly about your mindset and a few other basics.

“This game is won or lost before you ever step out your front door.” That’s what I tell every single guy I work with.

Why is this? Because it’s all in your head. Period. It’s your mindset. It’s how you think about yourself, and what value you place on yourself in this world.

That’s the starting point. From there, you get to how others perceive you and feel about you, but that comes as a direct result of how you think about yourself.

“I thought it was all about confidence,” you say.

Yes, and that confidence comes from how you think about yourself. You have to know who you are. You have to know your strengths and weaknesses. You have to be willing to accept your weaknesses. Not “accept” in the sense of never improving them, but in the sense of not running from them. Listen, we all have weaknesses, just as we all have strengths. You’ve got to be honest about both sides of yourself, with yourself.

Being confident does not mean being invincible.

Girls pick up on your honesty about yourself and how “real” you are. They call it your vibe. Maybe you’ve heard of it.

Whether I walk into a club, bookstore, grocery store, or any other venue, I will draw attention if I choose to walk in with confidence. This is a dynamic most guys don’t understand. Believe me, though, all girls understand it. They look for those guys that walk with an air of confidence. It’s such a rare thing, and that’s why it’s so damn attractive.

This confidence is something I can feel inside me. It’s something that radiates from me.

I’ve had girls who have known me for a while watch me with other girls and say, “You were good when you met me, but now you’re just so natural. You can get any group to take you in like they’ve always known you, even if they’ve never met you.”

I’ve had bouncers, regular patrons of clubs, and people in daily life talk about what sets me apart from every other guy. I’m not the biggest or hottest, yet I draw the attention of the hottest girls. Without exception, they talk about my confidence. Even they can see and feel it.

I teach guys all the time that there is no magic pill. When you’re out, you are required to open up, to talk. You can start talking with guys or with girls, but you have to start talking, regardless.

So, you learn the art of being subtle. You take a quick glance at a girl you like, but don’t gawk at her. When you glance, you notice something you can comment on. She may be looking in disgust at someone or something. She may be wearing something interesting, in which case she’s obviously begging for someone to talk to her. She wants the attention, or she wouldn’t be wearing whatever interesting item that is. She may have a lost or lonely look on her face. Maybe she’s playing with a straw, a glass, a napkin, a ring, or something else. All of that screams that she’d like someone to talk to.

Sidebar: Females are subtle. They know all they need to know about you with such a quick glance you don’t even know they’ve looked. They see your confidence or lack of it, whether you spend a ton of money on your clothes or not (brand and style), whether you groom yourself and worry about your personal appearance (haircut, facial hair, fingernails clean), your posture, eye contact with others, the whiteness of your smile, and how comfortable you are with others. The male who can do the same thing has a definite advantage.

I’ve walked into venues and, without saying a word, passed by highly attractive females who watched me coming, slightly moved their bodies to be closer to the path I was walking, and smiled at me as I walked by. Without saying anything, they’ve noticed me come in. Their body language has shown there is a level of attraction on their part even if they haven’t consciously realized it.

Where does this attraction come from?

They can sense the confidence coming from me.

Notice, there is a huge difference between confidence and arrogance. Arrogance is thinking, “I’m the shit. You can’t touch me. I do what I want, when I want, damn the rules. They don’t apply to me, period.”

Confidence is simply saying, “I know who I am. I know what my strengths and weaknesses are. I know what I have to offer to the right person. The question is, what does she have to offer me?”

Confidence is knowing what you can do and believing in yourself because you know you can do something. Confidence is being passionate about yourself and your life.

 
“You are now husband and wife. You may kiss your bride," the minister said to Jeff, my new husband. My mind was numb as I heard the words. I had a smile plastered on my face.

Why am I doing this? I’ve lived a life of lies. I know this fits right in. But still, why am I doing this? This is not who I wanted to be kissing while wearing a wedding dress.

Cut the scene.

Rewind.

Let’s go back a few years to see how I got here. In fact, I will let you hear it from the one who truly knows me better than anyone. The one I should have been marrying.

 
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